Healing After Disaster
The 5 Stages of Grief and a Path to Recovery
During the past week, we were directly impacted by the fires in Southern California. Family members were displaced, friends lost their homes and businesses, the air was unhealthy for days, and we continue to be in a state of shock and grief.
Natural disasters happen on a regular basis; but you never expect it to happen to you, your friends, your community.
It is this ongoing experience that led me to prepare this article. The thoughts in it can help all of us when life brings a period of shock and grief.
A natural disaster can feel like an emotional earthquake, leaving you standing in the rubble of a life you once knew. It’s not just the loss of possessions—it’s the loss of safety, stability, and sometimes, your sense of identity. To heal, it’s essential to understand the emotional landscape you’re navigating.
Psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross introduced the "5 Stages of Grief," a framework often applied to the aftermath of loss. These stages are not linear; you might move back and forth between them or experience several at once. Here, we’ll explore each stage and how the Pondera Process can help you move through them with greater ease.
Before diving into these stages, it’s important to understand the Pondera Process®—an innovative energy psychology method designed to help you balance your emotional and physical energy system. By blending science, psychology, and spiritual wisdom, the Pondera Process® empowers you to address distress, shift underlying beliefs, and find relief in as little as 20 minutes.
1. Denial
Denial often acts as an emotional shock absorber. When faced with the enormity of a natural disaster, your mind might say, “This isn’t happening.” Denial helps you survive the initial impact, giving you time to process reality slowly.
Signs You’re in Denial:
Avoiding conversations about the disaster’s impact.
Believing things will quickly return to normal without any effort.
How the Pondera Process Can Help:
Denial often masks underlying fear or pain. Using the Pondera Process®, you can gently uncover and address these hidden emotions. By balancing your energy system, you create a safe space for acceptance to emerge naturally, without forcing it.
2. Anger
Anger might surface as frustration, resentment, or even rage—directed at nature, authorities, or yourself. It’s a natural response to the perceived unfairness of loss. Beneath anger often lies hurt or fear.
Signs You’re in Anger:
Blaming others for the disaster or its aftermath.
Feeling overwhelmed by frustration at the slow recovery process.
How the Pondera Process Can Help:
Anger disrupts the energy flow in your body, creating tension. The Pondera Process® can help release this pent-up energy while allowing you to explore what’s fueling your anger. By addressing its root cause, you’ll feel more empowered to respond, not just react.
3. Bargaining
Bargaining often involves "if only" scenarios. You might think, “If only we had evacuated sooner” or “What if we had prepared better?” It’s an attempt to regain control over an uncontrollable situation.
Signs You’re in Bargaining:
Replaying decisions leading up to the disaster.
Making promises to yourself (or a Higher Power) to prevent future loss.
How the Pondera Process Can Help:
Bargaining keeps you tethered to the past, often fueled by guilt or regret. The Pondera Process® allows you to release these heavy emotions by identifying the beliefs holding you back. As you rebalance, you’ll find it easier to accept what is and focus on what can be.
4. Depression
Depression arises when the reality of the loss fully sinks in. It’s the weight of sadness, often accompanied by feelings of emptiness or hopelessness. While painful, this stage is a sign you’re beginning to confront the truth.
Signs You’re in Depression:
Feeling drained or unable to find joy in activities.
Isolating yourself from friends and community support.
How the Pondera Process Can Help:
Depression signals a disruption in the flow of your energy system. The Pondera Process® can help restore balance by gently addressing the sadness and underlying beliefs fueling it. With practice, you’ll begin to reconnect with hope and motivation.
5. Acceptance
Acceptance doesn’t mean you’re "over" the disaster; it means you’re learning to live with your new reality. It’s the point where you stop resisting and start rebuilding.
Signs You’re in Acceptance:
Feeling at peace with the past.
Starting to envision a new future for yourself and your community.
How the Pondera Process Can Help:
Acceptance often requires letting go of old patterns and embracing change. The Pondera Process® can help solidify this stage by aligning your energy with your vision for the future. It’s a tool for creating forward momentum, helping you feel empowered to take the next steps in your journey.
Final Thoughts
Healing after a natural disaster isn’t about "getting over it." It’s about moving through the pain with intention and grace. The 5 Stages of Grief provide a roadmap, but you don’t have to navigate them alone. The Pondera Process® offers a powerful way to address the emotional turbulence, helping you create a sense of balance and possibility as you heal.
Remember: you’re not broken—you’re in transition. Each stage you move through brings you closer to peace, serenity, and joy.
If you’d like to learn more about how the Pondera Process® can support your healing journey, access free resources and/or try out our membership program and discover the tools to rebuild your life with confidence.
What encouragement and advice, based on our own experiences, would you share with the larger community? Share your thoughts in the comments --- we can all benefit.
You are correct. I became trained and certified in EFT about 20 years ago, and that experience led me to be cerified in the practice of energy psychology. The use of various energy practices have been critical to my wellbeing and those around me for quite awhile. You can find a number of free resources that complement EFT on my Empowered Self Help website. My hope is that our natural disaster will provide an opportunity to equip a larger audience with the value of energy tools.
Thank you, Ryan.