Why the “Right” Choice Is a Myth
And How to Free Yourself from Decision Paralysis
Have you ever stood in a restaurant, staring at the menu, unable to decide what to order?
You scan the options over and over, second-guessing yourself. Should I stick with my usual? Try something new? What if I regret it?
It seems like a small, insignificant decision. But in that moment, it feels bigger—because what if you choose wrong?
Now, zoom out. This same fear shows up in the choices that do feel big:
Should I leave this relationship?
Is this the right career move?
What if I make a mistake and regret it?
When we believe there’s a right decision and a wrong one, we paralyze ourselves, waiting for certainty. But here’s the truth: there is no single “right” choice—only the choice you make and what you do with it.
The Myth of the Perfect Decision
We’re taught to believe that every major choice has one correct answer. Society, family, and even past mistakes reinforce the idea that if we don’t choose wisely, we’ll be stuck with regret.
But life doesn’t work that way. There’s no cosmic scoreboard keeping track of right and wrong decisions. There’s only what you choose and how you grow from it.
Instead of asking, “What’s the right decision?” ask:
“Which option aligns with my values right now?”
“What choice allows for growth, even if it’s uncomfortable?”
“What’s my next best step?”
Why Fear of Mistakes Keeps You Stuck
If you find yourself paralyzed by indecision, it’s usually because of:
Perfectionism: Believing there’s only one ideal path and fearing failure.
Regret Avoidance: Worrying that your future self will wish you had chosen differently.
External Validation: Feeling pressured to make the “socially acceptable” choice.
Ironically, staying stuck is also a choice—and it reinforces the belief that you can’t trust yourself.
Reframing Decisions as Growth, Not Tests
Instead of treating every decision like a test, start seeing them as stepping stones. Every choice, even the “wrong” ones, teaches you something.
Think back to a past decision you agonized over. Maybe you worried about moving to a new city or leaving a job. But now, you probably see that even if it wasn’t perfect, it led to growth, resilience, and new opportunities.
You always have the power to pivot. That’s the real secret.
How to Make Confident Decisions Without the Overwhelm
If fear is keeping you from moving forward, try this:
1. Regulate Your Nervous System First
Your brain can’t make clear choices in a state of stress. Before making a decision, try:
✅ Deep breathing or meditation
✅ A short walk to clear your mind
✅ Using the Pondera Process® for Emotions to release anxiety around the choice
2. Shift from “Right vs. Wrong” to “Expansive vs. Contracting”
Instead of asking, “What if I choose wrong?” ask:
“Which option feels freeing, exciting, or like growth?”
“Which option feels small, restrictive, or fear-based?”
Decisions made from expansion—not fear—lead to more aligned outcomes.
3. Give Yourself Permission to Course-Correct
You are never trapped by a decision. If something doesn’t work, you can adjust. Trust that you have the ability to navigate whatever comes next.
4. Take a Small Step and Gather Data
Big decisions feel overwhelming, but they’re really just a series of small steps. Instead of waiting for absolute clarity, take one action and see how it feels.
Clarity often comes after action—not before.
Final Thought: Trust Yourself More
Think back to the restaurant menu. No matter what you order, you either enjoy it—or learn something for next time. And that’s how life works, too.
The next time you catch yourself spiraling in indecision, remind yourself: there is no single perfect path—only the one you create through action and adjustment.
👉 What’s one decision you’ve been overthinking? What’s the smallest step you can take today? Drop a comment—I’d love to hear your thoughts!